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3–4 minutes

No. You are Not Average

It’s around the Covid years and I am seated on grass at a leased farm in Kiserian. The Kajiado sun is hot and harsh, but the wind makes it bearable. Tranquil even. The environment and the place is peaceful, but I am not. I am lamenting to my dear friend, Gakii, about my troubles. My resignation to an average life. At this time, I have tried many things to become exceptional to no success. Right in front of us is a farm that siphons my money each passing minute. I have been trying this farming thing for some time now and it is not working out as well as I thought it would. Frustration grows every day. Other areas of my life are not so great. I am not destitute, but I thought I would be doing better by this time. I am beginning to wonder if this is it. I had such high expectations for myself and worked hard towards the things I thought would lead me to great heights.

“I think my life is normal and average. There’s nothing really special about it and perhaps it will be like that. I am coming to accept that,” I tell Gakii.

“No you’re not,” she cuts in sharply. “You have never been average. You could be here today and go live life as a hobo tomorrow.”

I laugh a little about the last part because I know in my soul that it’s true. These words have stayed with me ever since. They are the words I remember her with since her passing. I go back to that conversation every now and then to remember myself. To remember my dear friend who believed so much in me and never hesitated to remind me who I was in that moment when I was drowning in self-pity.

So today, years later, I come back to that conversation with a letter to say that I believed her words.

Here goes…

Gakii…you were right. I was never an average person. And I was never to live a mediocre life. I could chose the most unconventional path. And in my own ways, I am doing exactly that. As I write this, I am on a bus coming from Luanda Kotieno headed to Bondo. Do you know where that is? Luanda Kotieno? Yeah, I didn’t either. Not until today. On this bus, my heart is full. I am so content. My heart swells with joy. My curiosity is quenched, for now..until the next one.

Where will my curiosities take me next? I wonder too. I am yet to find out. But today, my circuit ends at Siaya. I am making my way back with great pride. I am very proud of myself. The heart wants what it wants. And mine? It desires many things. Craves for many experiences. It surprises me too but I am always up for the ride. I know longer frown upon my heart’s desires. I engage them earnestly. The more outrageous the better. And each time I do, I realize that they were not outrageous. That I was not a hopeless dreamer. That these desires are within reach. And should I be a hopeless dreamer, then so be it. I would die trying to live a non-ordinary life.

I am wrapping up my journey with so much enthusiasm for life. Another veil of limitation has been pulled down for me. Travelling does that to me. Each time I do, I renew my imagination of life’s possibilities. My life is no longer confined to the walls of my house  and the familiarity of the places I already know. Kutembea kwingi ni kuona mengi, wahenga were not tripping. There is an intangible benefit, an awareness, a wisdom that I gain whenever I leave my familiar and go to foreign places. I can’t wait to see what I do next. I go back to my non-ordinary life re-energised and ready to take on what lies ahead in the coming days.

You would have loved to see my becoming. Continue resting.

4 responses to “No. You are Not Average”
  1. Noel Omondi Avatar
    Noel Omondi

    That was deep 🥹

    1. Muriuki Maina Avatar

      🤍

  2. Laura Avatar

    Beautifully written. You eulogized your friend beautifully. Cheers to evolving!

    1. Muriuki Maina Avatar

      Thanks. To evolving 🥂

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